About Therapy
Relationships are built on…
Respect for, empathy toward, and a profound understanding of each another.
Because isn’t that what we signed up for? To be loved and appreciated by our special someone and to show them in turn why they’re important to us.
Like most things in life, they require conscious thought, action, and effort.
Here’s what most people don’t get – that partnerships and connections must be nurtured. That it’s not a done deal once we say I do or make the seven rounds of the fire.
That was just the first chapter to your book, and there’s a whole lot more of writing to be done.
Relationships can be an emotional rollercoaster of experiences and emotions…
… if we don’t know how to fix them.
Partnership can have highs of passion, intimacy, and joy… but it can also come with the lows of disappointment, frustration, and loneliness. It’s a balancing act that few can successfully manage independently, especially if we experienced difficulties in learning to trust or unhealthy attachment growing up. We still feel trapped by the weight of that baggage. Often this is expressed in the form of behaving haphazardly or through self-destructive patterns in the relationship, such as trusting too easily or choosing someone who is not right for you.
Helping you understand how relationships work and what’s getting in the way…
Over the past 15 years, I have made it my mission to help people uncover the secrets to having healthy, long, and satisfying relationships. As a licensed psychologist and relationship expert, with a Ph.D. from Columbia University, I have helped enhance every conceivable type of relationship and couple – newlyweds, heterosexual couples, two-career partners, cohabitants, same sex-partners, not-yet-marrieds, and those wanting to “consciously uncouple” or divorce.
I have also helped people figure out who they are and what they want in relationships, not just with their spouse but also with family members or in-laws.
Because life is too short!
Do you really want to keep going around in circles with your love-life problems?
I’ll help you quickly identify the roadblocks and challenges embedded within your family, culture, or background, so they can be understood and fixed, once and for all. As an immigrant, I know what it’s like to have your foot in two different cultures. I know what it’s like to feel misunderstood. I know what it’s like not to know what to do.
In my work, I use mindfulness and principles of Cognitive and Dialectical Behavior Therapy, which I have found effective across cultural and religious barriers. My sessions are interactive and collaborative. You’ll have plenty to think about and work on outside of session. I will assign books or excerpts to read and things to practice – because the work must happen not just in session, but outside of session!
Wondering if it’s too late… or even impossible?
After one too many disappointing encounters with partners, you may wonder if it’s possible for you or if you are capable of being a partner that can commit and bring their best selves to a relationship.
I’m here to remind you that you can change, that you are capable of growth and wisdom and moving from a place of pain and hurt to a place of strength and resilience.
Because we’re not perfect, and we make mistakes – and we sometimes hurt people we love. And just because that’s happened before does not mean it always has to be this way!
About Me
I welcome people of diverse cultures and sub-cultures and persons of color.
As an immigrant and one of the few South Asian therapists in New York City… I know what it’s like to feel like everything needs to work like clockwork. To put unrealistic pressure and expectations on yourself. To try and be everything to everyone. To wonder whether it’s worth it. To look at your life more closely and wonder why you are signing yourself up for a rat-race? To short-change yourself and what you want from life for the sake of your spouse or your family.
This applies not just to folks from India and immigrants or children of immigrants but to other international clients who talk to me about the very same struggles! My clients are from countries like China, Japan, Korea, Afghanistan, Pakistan, Latin America, Mexico, Spain, and the UK.
And I’m so proud that I can serve such a diverse group of people. And that they trust me to understand and take care of them.
When I first came to the US to pursue my graduate studies…
… there was no South Asian therapist in New York City. At least none that I could find who would understand me or why my family was important – why I had such a hard time putting myself out there. And so, I tried to fit in. Do everything that was expected and more. Perfectionism was my best friend, and it took me to many fantastic places, but then I got fed up. I no longer wanted to run a race with myself constantly.
As a psychologist, I had to face some hard truths about myself before I could ask the same of others. Becoming a parent made that transition to empathy and humility much easier.
My journey has helped me become open and curious about others. We all do what we do for good reason. So, it’s not my business to judge or criticize you but to help you find your way and identify what’s not working. I will not waste your time agreeing with you if I don’t. Or nod and shake my head when I see you doing things that are getting in your way.
You can count on me to call you out and tell you what needs to change and how because I don’t believe we have to be in therapy indefinitely. I want to use what you have and move on to the business of life.
In my personal life…
I use mindfulness, meditation, and yoga to help center myself. I have found them to be invaluable to self-care, emotional resilience, and compassion.
I like to read, connect with my peers, spend time outdoors with my kids, and go on endless walks with my dogs. My family reminds me every day about what’s important and worth living for and investing in.
Let’s find the missing piece of your life puzzle… together.
I am intimately familiar with the struggles of seeking help and the ambivalence and stigma surrounding mental health treatment. I am also aware that sometimes we choose to suffer in silence and with an “I can handle it” attitude for far too long, forgetting that true courage lies in knowing when we need help and asking for it.
But the quality of your relationships affects your overall sense of well-being, happiness, and success.
So…
If you are willing to be proactive about your life and are determined to make changes to improve the quality of your partnership…
If you seek to be loved, valued, and respected for who you are and what you bring to the table…
If you are ready to put aside pride, shame, guilt, and blame to invest in yourself and your future…